Today was the first morning of the year where I woke up naturally sad, and it was nice that I lasted more than a month without this and it sucks because how do you fix a day that is already so artlessly and instinctively broken.
You don't. And today just got worse, naturally. For how long, who knows. All you can do is make tiny little helpful choices, like having drinking coffee out of a delicate glass mug, or spending a few extra minutes replanting green cuttings. Adding whatever good things you can onto the pile until the scales tip back again.
Clear morning light through gold and copper and glass, breaking up into a thousand dollops across the table, over the edge, out of sight. How can this day be so beautiful and so bitingly, witlessly low at the same time. How can this week. How can anything.