In Dreams

08.16.10

In the beginning I was with all my family members who went on the Thailand trip and we were on vacation again, only this time it was a shopping vacation. A firm would take us from place to place in a big shuttle bus to find deals, but the stores we went to were extremely shady and everything in there was junk, anyways.

Later, Callum and I were visiting a Japanese museum because we had locked ourselves out of the apartment. It was a museum that included a replica of the entire house and grounds of a Japanese noblewoman from the edo period. It was fun, but it was such a hot day and we both lef after a couple of hours with cold sake drinks in souvenir cups. Walking home we met up with the apartment manager who had also just come from the museum. He had a souvenir cup, too. We went with him to the mailboxes, which is apparently where he kept spare keys. A bunch of his friends walked up and they were kind of obnoxious.

A couple minutes after getting into the house we were talking and joking around about the annoying friends and then we started kissing. All of a sudden I felt something small and jagged in my mouth. Did your tooth fall out? I exclaimed. No, said, Callum. I started running my tongue over my teeth and felt a jagged space in the center of my upper front teeth. Then I went to look in the mirror and saw that a couple of my other teeth were chipped and that most of my teeth were discolored and on the verge of breakage. I freaked out. How could this have happened to my teeth so quickly? I cried. My teeth looked great yesterday! Callum tried to calm me down my saying that for now I could drink some serum (I think my brain meant cough syrup) and some alcohol and just wait til tomorrow to deal with it. I didn't say anything out loud but I thought it might be a bad idea to get crunked when my teeth were so fragile. I was desperate to go see my dentist, who was Roger Ebert, but it was a Sunday. I was on the verge of hysterics when I woke up.

08.07.10

Callum won some sort of bet and Merrill lent him her Porsche 9-11 convertible for the weekend. He wanted to get up to some very fast speeds so we took it down a long straight stretch of freeway one night. We started out when the sun was going down and we were just driving and driving and driving for hours and it was pitch dark when all of a sudden a light appeared above us. It was greenish and looked like it was coming from a very small flying saucer, hovering several feet above the car.

Before we could even really be alarmed or try to communicate with it, bright lights appeared on the left side of the road. Along the highway where you might expect houses or businesses to be was an enormous and adorable land of lights. We slowed the car way down to see it. All the buildings and characters looked like they were straight out of friends with you and it was so incredibly colorful. There was a rainbow of bright lights, turning, bobbing, blinking and there was music playing. You couldn't see a soul in the actual park but it was incredible, one of the most amazing things I'd ever seen. We just stared at it in absolute wonder until we passed it.

03.14.10

I was a character in a real life Nintendo role-playing game. Well, I couldn't really tell at first, but basically I was being forced to live out days identical to Harvest Moon, except that some of the other people in the game spoke French half the time and that ticked me off to no end. 

The dream/game was half modern (I could plot out some things to do with my crops on a fancy computer) and half very antiquated (I had to always wear this pale pink frilly dress and a little hat and work many of the crops by hand). Partway through it got crossed with a mystery Nintendo game, too, so that in the midst of my farming I was trying to gather clues and piece them together to solve some sort of puzzle. 

There was a brief interlude where Sasa and Juliette came to visit me, or rather, J and I went to Sasa's house, which was nearby and looked just like Merrill's parents' house. We were discussing the things which we'd recently received for Christmas and Sasa was showing us some of her gifts: a 1000 piece puzzle and a mousepad with a picture of Heath Ledger as the Joker on it. I was telling her how I had the same mousepad (sans Joker). It was one of the main tools used to play the game and had a compass and various other riddle-solving calculators.

At the end of the dream I got to drive into town and that part of the game consisted of the other players occasionally shouting a direction to me in French at the last minute, right before something awful was about to happen. The last thing I remember they yelled "gauche, gauche, GAUCHE!!" and an enormous yellow light rail train appeared in my path a second later and I had to veer like a mad fucker over on a little side street to the left.

1.13.10

All I remember is that I was married to Gerard Butler and he was awesome. That's really all I need to remember.

1.12.10

Nolan and I enrolled in classes together but on the first day of school I found out somehow that I'd fucked up and didn't actually get into any of the classes I wanted. We talked things over in a 7-11 and he convinced me to just go to the school and see what I could do.

Well, what I apparently decided to do was just walk into a random classroom at the beginning of the period and sit right in the middlemost desk in the room. It was a foreign language class, a Greek class, no less. 

The first thing that happens is that the teacher gives a quiz. Oh fuck, I'm screwed, I think. But then I figure I'll just right any random name on the test and fill the rest out with gibberish and turn it in. No one will ever know. The name I choose is "Talbot Paxton". 

Next they take roll call and I am feeling more and more awkward each minute, but somehow none of the other students seem to realize they've never seen me in the class before.

Finally, the teacher announces that we have to work in pairs to finish a worksheet assignment. At this point I just freak out, gather all of my things up and just run from the class, not looking back.

1.04.10

Merrill was having a pre-wedding day party at this bed and breakfast way out in the woods, a quaint and very pretty little inn type place. The party was basically as elaborate as an actual wedding and she actually wore a simple white dress and her bridesmaids wore kind of matching outfits, too.

The afternoon of the party I went to look at the buffet-style dining table. It was completely covered with hundreds of types and candy and there were also bowls of chips everywhere, like barbecued Lays I think. 

I had to get a complete physical in order to be in the wedding and the time right before the party started was the only time left to do it in. I had it done in this room right off the dining hall. I was completely mortified because all the doors to this room were completely open and partway through the physical Sean Connery walked in. He was very polite about the whole thing but it was still horrid. 

After I got the clearance and was walking to the guest rooms of the house to get ready a bunch of partygoers arrived and I noticed all my old boyfriends coming in one by one. Great. 

I changed in my bedroom and was super flustered because the dress I was supposed to wear was mega short and I knew I'd be tugging on it all night. Also only half my toenails were painted.

12.30.09

My sister and I are attending this festival type show only it's indoors at this big, old auditorium. The day of the concert arrives and as we get to the door I look at our tickets and see that, yes, they are seats 10 & 11 but one of them is in Row 34 and the other one is in Row 340. Oh god. 

We go in and sit together in completely random seats. We don't know the first two bands that come on and the place is still pretty empty because they had bumped the festival dates up a few weeks all of a sudden and some people don't even know. However, the real ticketholders for our seats show up pretty soon and so we stand up to leave. Just then a bunch of people I do not like and do not want to see file in and take their seats in the section behind us. I do my best to not let them see me and we move to these terrible seats where you can't see shit and everyone has to watch on these little screens. I'm so fed up that we decide to just leave.

Outside of the theater there are a whole bunch of enormous statues in a plaza and some tourists stop me to help them take their picture. For the life of me, no matter what position I move into I cannot get them framed right with the statues. Every time it looks good through the viewfinder, I'll snap the picture and it will come out all fucked up. After about 30 minutes of these some other friends come into the plaza and we all skip quickly away, running down some stairs. I think we were going to get eggs for breakfast.

12.27.09

I was riding this little open air tram around San Francisco. It was really slow-moving and was fairly reminiscent of the Casey Jr. Railroad ride at Disneyland. I got off at a stop for a restaurant, to visit my friend Sheryl who was a pastry chef there. She showed me some of the new things they were making and gave me a kitchen tour.

Suddenly they received word that one of their sous chefs wouldn't be in for the lunch service because of some emergency. Sheryl asked if I could fill in. I agreed even though I was like oh shit, oh my god shit, I don't know fucking anything and especially can't make anything at restaurant speed & pressure and oh shit what?? inside. 

But instead of actually making anything for the meals I start experimenting with all of the candy equipment and before you know it I've made bunches of filled chocolate bars and these big half sphere caramel bonbons, really fancy awesome shit like valencia orange rosemary mint scented dark chocolate and lavender, black pepper caramels. And they are perfect and shiny and beautiful. 

The head chef comes in to inspect them and it is Jamie Lauren and she thinks they are the BOMB, that's right, son. 

Later on I leave the restaurant on the tram again only now it's raining and a big umbrella fight breaks out.

12.24.09

I got involved in some sort of crazy cat racing scheme, or maybe I was just investigating it. The cats raced on an actual track, only they were each in these clear acrylic boxes. The track was quite muddy and slippery and th cats were constantly flopping over and have to right themselves. The boxes tipped quite a bit but they were a lot more bendable and cooperative than normal physical laws would've allowed. 

Later I worked in a very large hospital and mall combination building and the R.O. came when my coworkers and I were all meandering around this enormous indoor playground area. We arranged to go take some pictures together. I was thinking about this decision in my apartment (nrh) later that night. I was sitting in the dark drinking some water and when I opened the shutters I lived next to a very large gym and I watched people doing aerobics from the kitchen window.

12.23.09

I was having some sort of big party at my house (nrh) where there were long rows of tall tables and we were all playing board games. The party was seriously populated by mucho bitches, mostly people from high school that I haven't kept in touch with since.

All of a sudden there was a scream. A guy with a short, neat ''fro and dressed in scrubs and a lab coat said loud and very clearly "I've killed someone". When I went over to investigate there was a very slight bloody mess and a small lump about the size of a chicken nugget of what appeared to be intestinal tissue. Now, where the rest of the body disappeared to is anyone's guess and how we were to infer that this guy killed someone in plain sight of the game-playing and then got rid of all but one nugget of the body was also perplexing, even in the dream. 

The party obviously disbanded and Sabra and I went down to a local bar, a very busy hip place that had a dj spinning all day and night. We went and sat on some stools right at the bar and I asked the dj if he would play "Come Pick Me Up" and he agreed. He found the cover for it and it was somehow a three vinyl copy. However, someone had stolen the record with the song on it, the middle record. I was massively disappointed and he was unhappy, too. That's one of the best breakup songs ever, he said. We finished our drinks quietly at another table. I slammed down my glass and walked up to the dj and asked him if he would play the song if I brought my copy in. Absolutely, he answered.